Caitlyn Rides the Nationals

You all will remember my story of Lauren’s friend Caitlyn who was working hard to make the national finals.  This weekend she went to Harrisburg, Penn. as a qualified finalist in the Pessoa Medal Finals.  Pennsylvania is a long way from Texas.  Her horse Ky and trainer, Trapp, traveled long days and nights.  Ky was stalled in many unfamiliar places.  Ky and Caitlyn met up on Friday to continue living the dream of riding the national finals.

We watched as a live feed from USEF brought us the ‘warm-up’ round yesterday.  Caitlyn was one of over 260 junior riders looking for a spot in the top-eight. We watched on our little computer in Wharton, Texas as Caitlyn entered the big arena in Harrisburg.  Before her had gone some of the top young riders in country, Lillie Keenan, Jacob Pope, Tori Colvin and Shawn Casady.  The camera caught her face clearly as she rode into the ring, calm but determined. Her warm-up round was beautiful.  She did not place in the top ten riders of her section but certainly rode well.

This morning, once today’s course was posted, the 250 plus riders and their trainers swarmed the arena like a million ants, walking the course, determining strategy and seeing the jumps up close.  There is no warm-up ride to this final event.  The horse goes in the arena and is expected to jump what is there, sight unseen. Caitlyn was deep in the list of riders.  It made for long hours, waiting and watching as some of the country’s best went before her.  Finally it was time for Caitlyn and Ky to enter the tunnel to the arena.  I was scared to death just watching.  Caitlyn had poise and calm far greater than her years of experience. It was not that long ago that Caitlyn just started these USEF shows and just had this year of hitting the nationals.  Some of these kids started in national pony finals as six-year olds.

Caitlyn and Ky negotiated the course well.  Former judges and top trainers felt she had a great ride but it would not be enough to make the cut for the finals. 

Which is too bad on many accounts.  Not just that, wow, it would have been great to see her make the work-off (the ultimate challenge of the final), but because Caitlyn and Ky do their best work when given the most difficult course.  And tonight’s work-off was just that,  a demanding course that asked a lot of the horse and rider.  But nothing Caitlyn and Ky had not practiced a million times in the last few years.  They would have been superb! 

Caitlyn (and Ky) have everything to be proud of tonight as they head to Baltimore before tomorrow’s long trip home.  A nation of horse crazy girls (and so many of her peers right here in Houston) watched a few years ago when Animal Planet did a reality show about how difficult it was to make it on the road to the national finals.  We all watched it.  But only Caitlyn went on and actually did it.  She did all work, rode all the shows, practiced all the moves and built up the points to make it to the top shows in the United States. 

So I say to you, Caitlyn-You are amazing! We back here at home could not be more proud of you tonight!

What I have Learned from my Kid’s Sports

Amber at the top, Ally ready to hit and Lauren-my girls at the ball field.

I have been a mother for over 30 years.  With three daughters spread out in age over 12 years, I have seen them pursue some of the same interests and some unique. 

My oldest daughter Amber, well, what can I say?  I was younger, more willing to keep up with crazy practice schedules and her dad was a good athlete in his own right.  He was willing to coach her teams and did a great job of seeing Amber was exposed to multiple sports while encouraging her to practice and play hard.  My dad had been a great athlete and we hoped Amber had inherited some of his skills.  Amber played (and her dad coached her) on an all-boys soccer team until she was 12.  Likewise, she played boy’s Little League until about the same age before moving to girl’s fast-pitch softball.

Amber ended up playing Junior Olympic Fast Pitch softball.  We were in Florida at the time and she got to play a lot of international ball.  At one time I believe they were  ranked 13th in the world.

Ally came along when we were deep in fast pitch fever.  When her dad found out she was a lefty-he was thrilled.  Nothing like a good left-handed pitcher.  Ally played some ball and soccer but really rated running track.  She won several City and County awards.  One of my favorite memories was of her and I running a 5K across the Melbourne Causeway running toward the Atlantic Ocean when she was only ten-years old.  Ally got into the horseback riding about that time as well.  She showed 4H and local shows with her friends from Wickham Park.  Many of whom, are still dear friends all these years later.

In Texas, Ally did competitive cheerleading on a traveling team.  I didn’t like it as much as horseback riding competitions but applauded how hard the team worked and how tough the competition was in competitive cheer.

Lauren never really got to do much of the organized sports like softball or soccer.  Divorce was disrupting a lot of things then and Lauren got swept along in riding horses.  She had her first horse at age six in Florida and has been riding ever since.

Here are some things I learned that I would have never known without sports in my kid’s life:

  • Ball parks are a great place to raise small children-Lauren pretty much grew up at the Melbourne and Palm Bay ball fields.  While Hilary Clinton said it takes a village to raise a child, in her case it took a ball team and their families. Someone was always on hand to help out.
  • With that said, in those Florida years, the team was our family.  We spent Thanksgivings and other holidays with teammember families.  To this day, the Bergstressers are close friends, attending Amber and Ally’s weddings.
  • The cheerleading taught me how to style and french braid hair, skills I still use today (okay, so maybe I am braiding the horse’s tail, but still).  I learned a lot about tumbling and choreography and the hours spent making something look simple that was quite complex.
  • I learned a lot of new things when Ally started 4H with the horses and even more when Lauren went the English route a few years later.  I continue to learn more every day about this difficult and demanding sport.
  • Our horse show family here has expanded over the years.  My dearest friends here in Houston are my horse show friends.

The biggest thing I learned from my daughter’s sport activities is that all my children are tougher, stronger and more determined than I ever could have been.  Each one of them has taught me the meaning of courage and perseverance.  I am so proud of each of them.  I can’t wait to see what sport roads my grandchildren go down.  I will be cheering them along.  Count on it.

Outings

Today found Lauren  and Mickey off to Dev’s for the final tune-up before next week’s show.  They had a good lesson, in fact, I believe Dev may have said Mickey was as good as he has ever looked.  Wow.  Not where I thought we would be after our summer off work.  I am very pleased.

Today found me taking my mother to the nail salon.  She had “fake” nails on and has had them (not the same ones) for many years.  I have needed to get them off of her but have not been able to get her to the salon.  I was frightened about what we would find under the “fake” nails.  And not to be too graphic but I am unclear if my mom has had a pedicure since leaving Tucson last March.  I was not going to take that on and none of my daughters were volunteering.

The trip to the nail salon was a huge success with newly painted hot pink toes and finger nails.  I am pretty sure she kissed the nail girl goodbye.

Successful outings all around.

Families

The Davis Family last October-from me clockwise-Ally, Jordyn, Luke, Riley, Amber, Lexi, Ryan, Blake and Lauren

Families are built day by day, year by year with actions, words and inevitably with memories.  In the beginning, as babies then as children, teens and young adults in many ways we are formed and molded by our home lives.  Our parents, friends and environment all have an impact on us. 

No one has a perfect life and many come from horrible situations and manage to overcome them.  We all know stories of people who have risen from nothing to be successful or brilliant. 

While I understand I have been very fortunate, in the home in which I was raised, to the opportunities for education, and the support I always received, whether I deserved it or not, I have battled many issues in my life. 

This month marks 14 years since I separated from my now ex-husband.  We are both better off without the other.  My children perhaps would have been better off in a two-parent home but I could not give that to them.  As a single mother, I have raised three girls, now 30, 24 and 19 years of age.  I don’t know who had it the worst, the oldest one who had some great memories of two supportive parents, the middle child who had some solid years as a part of a family or my youngest who has little memory of ever having a ‘real’ family.  Is it better to have known a family and lose it or never to have known it at all?  I know there were/are disadvantages to the lives of all my children.

Life is a funny thing.  While the years are moving along, we accept the status quo and complain about the weather, our job or politics.  Retrospectively, it is easy to compartmentalize certain periods of our lives, like when the kids were little, or when we lived in this house or that city. 

Please forgive my ramblings.  I continue to try to make sense of the Alzheimer world my mother lives in now.  I have been forced into introspection  about what is family, who supports whom, what are the roles, how do we manage when the roles change. 

In an instant, with an unintended action, bad memories can flood us. We are returned to a time when we were all different people.  It is so easy to allow fighting to hurt one of our family members senselessly.  It is hard to regain the ground we took years to level.  A place where we all are safe and secure in the love of one another.

Families are like that, you know, built of feathers and molded without cement.  They can blown apart by strong north wind.  But I hope each time the wind settles, the family will come back again, stronger.  The rain will stop and hopefully what is left is shiny and new and not too badly eroded away. 

I hope my family continues to build with our new roles and love to strengthen our ties.